A woman has provoked a furious debate after being offended by a comment made by a new love interest after they were intimate.
Taking to the British parenting forum, Mumsnet, the woman in her early 30s said that she’d slept with man she’s been dating for a few weeks, but after oral sex, he told he she ‘tastes kind of strong’ and advised her to drink more water.
She said his health advice was ‘not appreciated’ and that she doesn’t want to see him again, but commenters were left fiercely divided.
Some claimed that it was a positive that he could be so open and honest, and claimed she was being oversensitive.
However, others said they would see the comment as a ‘red flag’ and backed her decision not to see him again.
A British woman has provoked a furious debate on Mumsnet after being offended by a comment made by a new love interest after they were intimate (stock image)
The woman explained that she felt uncomfortable with the timing of the comment, right after the first time they had sex
Explaining how the situation unfolded, the woman wrote: ‘I am seeing a guy the last few weeks we are both early 30s.
‘He seems like a nice guy, and things were going great. Last night we slept together for the first time, it was great he was very generous in bed.’
But things went wrong after he performed oral sex and told her: ‘I think you should drink more water you taste kind of strong.’
She explained: ‘This was really hurtful to me, I’m sure he didn’t mean it to be hurtful and maybe I’m overly sensitive, but why would you say that when it is widely known that women/ girls are paranoid about how they look/ smell/ taste down there?
‘He’s not a gynaecologist so the health advice was not appreciated. He could see he had upset me and tried to back track saying “didn’t mean it like that” and “I’m crazy about you the last thing I want to do is offend you I was just trying to help”. But now I’m just seeing it as a red flag.’
Commenters advised the woman not to be too sensitive, and said that it’s likely he felt comfortable saying something because they’ve reached that level of intimacy
Her post left commenters fiercely divided, with many praising him for bringing it up and asking if there was any truth to it.
‘Have you noticed that you smell quite strongly? Could he have been right?’ one wrote. ‘He sounds as if he felt a bit awkward too, but kind of respect him for bringing it up and not waiting for you to ask why he doesn’t do it anymore and then be embarrassed.
‘Only you know the tone in which it was said but no immediate red flags for me.’
Commenters praised the man for his honesty, and said it was surely better for him to say something straight away, rather than not performing oral sex again because he was put off
Another agreed, saying: ‘He said strong, that’s all. He didn’t say awful or nasty. Why are you taking it to be a bad thing?’
One commenter, who said they’re an ex healthcare professional, replied saying: ‘I might have even advised a partner with strong smelling odor to go to the GP and get their kidney function checked too!
‘I even insist my husband eats a lot of pineapple before I will schedule in oral sex! If it was me I would find this man’s openness endearing. Buy a couple of pineapples to eat together and make a joke about it.’
A fellow user claimed that the man did ‘the right thing’ by saying something.
‘He’s trying to politely say you smell of old pee. I’d want to have oral sex with my partner and if they needed to wash then I would politely mention it,’ she wrote.
‘If they got so offended they had a big sulk I’d leave the relationship. It doesn’t sound like he tried to shame you, it’s basic respect for your partner to be clean before sex.
But others completely disagreed, with one writing: I think you’d have to be crazy to ever see him again, while one described him as a ‘charmless idiot’ and another claimed her was ‘rude and hurtful’ and said: ‘I’d have been upset too.’
Another agreed, adding: ‘You should one hundred percent trust your instincts. He made you feel ashamed when you were possibly in a vulnerable position after the first time you had sex.
‘You don’t need to do anything you don’t want to. You don’t owe him a thing.’
However, other commenters insisted they would be put off and supported the woman’s decision never to see him again