DMX's fiancée Desiree Lindstrom opens up on her grief after rapper's death: 'I haven't moved on'

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Desiree Lindstrom, the fiancée of late rapper DMX, has opened up on how she’s dealing with her grief in the wake of his death last year.

Lindstrom, speaking with It’s Tricky with Raquel Harper on Thursday, chat about raising their son Exodus, five, and other aspects of life following the rap icon’s April 9, 2021 death at 50 at White Plains Hospital in New York following a heart attack.

Lindstrom said her ‘life changed so fast’ following the death of the Party Up (Up in Here) artist, whose real name was Earl Simmons.

The latest: Desiree Lindstrom, the fiancée of late rapper DMX, has opened up on how she's dealing with her grief and raising their son Exodus, five, in the wake of the rapper's death last year

The rap icon, pictured in 2019, died April 9, 2021 at 50 at White Plains Hospital following a heart attack

The latest: Desiree Lindstrom, the fiancée of late rapper DMX, has opened up on how she’s dealing with her grief and raising their son Exodus, five, in the wake of the rapper’s death last year 

‘I haven’t moved on – it’s hard, you know?’ Lindstrom said. ‘It’s really hard. I just take it minute-by-minute. Some people say you could take it day-by-day, but it’s second-by-second.’

Lindstrom said she’s studying to be an esthetician and focused on raising her son as she looks to move forward amid the tough time.

‘I just want to build myself to be a great mother to Exodus,’ Lindstrom said. ‘I want him to see that he has a strong mother that can stand up on her own, and I’m just trusting in God through the process.’

Lindstrom said she goes ‘up and down with emotions’ in the wake of the rapper’s death, adding, ‘I have to really force myself to keep it moving, keep going.’

Lindstrom last month took to Instagram to pay tribute to DMX on Valentine's Day

Lindstrom last month took to Instagram to pay tribute to DMX on Valentine’s Day

Lindstrom said she's studying to be an esthetician and focused on raising her son as she looks to move forward amid the tough time

Lindstrom said she’s studying to be an esthetician and focused on raising her son as she looks to move forward amid the tough time 

She added, ‘Holidays get lonely … because Earl was my family, but I do have Exodus and I try to make the best of it, because I know that’s what he would’ve wanted me to do.’

Lindstrom opened up about how son Exodus is ‘stable’ amid a battle with stage-three kidney disease, and how the child has stayed strong and positive.

‘Sometimes it’s hard, just looking at him,’ Lindstrom said. ‘He has so many different qualities of his father. So when I do shed a tear, he’ll be like, “Mommy, are you okay?” And I’ll say, “You just did something that was like your father.” And he’s like, “Mommy, it’s okay, daddy’s with God, he’s watching over us. He’s our angel.”‘

She said she thanks ‘God that he gave me a son that is like that,’ adding, ‘He’s just like his dad.’

Lindstrom, who was involved with the late rapper for a decade, said she felt like they were ‘married,’ though they never exchanged vows.

‘A piece of paper ain’t s***,’ Lindstrom said. ‘Our love was real. He was there for me, I was there for him, and people know what the f*** it was, period.’

Following the death of the Ruff Ryders' Anthem artist, who was on life support for a week, his family issued a statement calling him'a warrior who fought till the very end.' He was pictured in 2017 in NYC

Following the death of the Ruff Ryders’ Anthem artist, who was on life support for a week, his family issued a statement calling him ‘a warrior who fought till the very end.’ He was pictured in 2017 in NYC 

She added, ‘One thing that Earl taught me was, who gives a f*** what people got to say about you? I knew that he loved me, he knew that I loved him.’

Lindstrom told Harper that she was ‘not even thinking’ about pursing a new romantic relationship following DMX’s death.

Lindstrom last month took to Instagram to pay tribute to DMX on Valentine’s Day, writing, ‘I know you earned your wings baby. I pray that you are at peace. Missing you too much this Valentine’s Day.’

Following the death of the Ruff Ryders’ Anthem artist, who was on life support for a week, his family issued a statement calling him ‘a warrior who fought till the very end.

‘He loved his family with all of his heart and we cherish the times we spent with him. Earl’s music inspired countless fans across the world and his iconic legacy will live on forever. We appreciate all of the love and support during this incredibly difficult time.’

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